Christian Education in the Home: Help! My Daughter Wants to Date (). Contrasts the non-covenantal pagan view of dating with the covenantal Christian . Main · Videos; The christian dating game paul washer biography. The same is true for textbooks thru dates. Toyboy exhilarates himself as the segue for “people . Basketball – 3rd-6th Grade Girls Game Schedule & Standings Recreational dating is expected on the school campuses, and if a child As was pointed out in the first two sermons, recreational dating is glorified divorce practice. by Paul Washer (Part 4 of 5); Biblical Courtship by Paul Washer (Part 5 of 5).
Now, something very important that I want you to see. If that young lady does not submit to her father and does not honor her father, she will not submit to you, she will not honor you.
What is her relationship with her father? Now, she could be a very dignified young lady, but her father is a terrible sinner. So I mean, you need to be very careful here. But if you see a rebellious spirit, which is the boast of people today, run from it. Now, also, she must be willing to be a caregiver, teacher and disciplinarian of her children.
This woman, she is going to be the mother of your children. So, do you want a girl who dresses sensually and wants to party all the time? I mean, is that really what you want? Is that what you want for your children? That she is someone upon whom the children can rest, someone in which they can find comfort and care, someone that you would want to entrust your children to.
She needs to be a teacher and a discipler. In the same way, you do not want to marry a girl who is just this vain sensual creature without any sense in her head, who can absolutely do nothing except dress-up and party. You need to marry someone who can manage the home. Brother Voddie Bauchum and I were teaching one time on a platform together answering questions. And Voddie picked up on it, so did I, you could tell.
Well, these three girls were brilliant. I think two of them were studying to be doctors and one of them was studying to be a lawyer. The average doctor works some where between seventy-five and eighty-five hours a week, more than double what most men work at an office job.
So now how, just mathematically, how do you plan on doing this? And then kindergarten, then grade school, then middle school, then high school, then collage.
And no, you are not going to have been a mother. You are going to be a doctor, who paid someone else to raise the children. Listen, my wife is very intelligent, could do a lot of things, could be making money right now. We live on a lower income. My wife does not work. She manages our home. We home school our children. We both have to work in order to make ends meet. Your wife and you have to work because you want two new cars, and you want to live in a house far too big and far too expensive and far too nice, you want to wear certain clothes and you want to go out to eat all the time.
How are you going to live? I want to be selfish and I want to play with my friends. And some couples, they should just go out and remove every possibility from themselves of having children. Because they think they can have their cake and eat it too. Because immediately when the children are born they turn them over to somebody, for someone else to raise. And so these are big important questions. If she herself is not disciplined, how is she going to discipline the children? Their father does not discipline them.
Because they do not discipline them. Most girls are taught, that if you want to be a homemaker, you are a loser. If all you want to be is a wife and raise children, you are a loser. You were taught things, and continue to be taught things, that to your grandfather would have be an unspeakable abomination. The next generation, what will they be taught? I am going to raise up a family, a godly heritage to the Lord, no matter what it costs me with regard to career, or anything else.
I am going to serve my God by serving my family and serving my church. Now, another thing I want to look really quick, she is the manager of the household.
She can do organization, financing, cooking, handling the home. Everything about the home, she can handle it. Edwards, the wife of Jonathan Edwards. I mean, all that guy did was study.
She molded her life around, not him, but what God was doing in him. She recognized that he was one of the greatest Christian scholars that ever walked the planet.
And she said, he needs to be locked away in that office thirteen hours a day, or whatever, studying and writing. She took care of everything. I am not the man Jonathan Edwards is, but praise God I have a wife who manages the home.
She manages just almost everything about it. And so, now I want to look at just a few things from Proverbs really quick. And again, you can have these notes. I can give them to Doug. Here is a girl that looks to her household, she looks to her home. Now, just a few things about her. Her husband trust in her to manage the home and the family-verse She does him good and not evil -verse She is industrious -verse 16 and She is the very opposite of a sluggard.
And I would tell her the same thing about you too. Guys, let me tell you something. It is biblical, it would be biblical for me, to pull off my belt and whip you. If I ever go to your home when you come home from school, and you go back to see your mom and dad, and she has to do your wash, pick up your underwear, and make your bed, you deserve to be horse whipped. Your mother was not brought into this world to do your wash.
As soon as a young man is able, he aught to be picking up his room, cleaning his room, making his bed, doing his wash, and everything else. Mom is not his servant. So, she is going to be the very opposite of the sluggard. You need to be the very opposite of the sluggard too. She delights in her work-verse She arises while it is still night -verse Her lamp does not go out at night-verse She does not eat the bread of idleness-verse She is knowledgeable in practical duties.
I mean, and this is not the fault of the young ladies. This is the fault of our culture and parents. And be very careful about your Christian ministries. Into the way we live. There are only a few people in history that have the gift of celibacy. God instituted the family before He did the church.
Dating, Courtship, and Marriage - Paul Washer | I'll Be Honest
And the family cannot function without the church. And this world hates marriage, it hates family, it hates the role of men and it hates the role of women. She has strength of character and body-verse 17 and verse She has prepared for the future. And she may be physically beautiful.
But her beauty is inward. In the end, guys, the beauty has to be inward.
Now, I want you to look at something, verse twenty-one and twenty-two. Her family is not just clothed, but her family is clothed with scarlet. Not just her family, but she herself. Let me give you an example, guys. This is very important. I was looking at the news and they came on with this guy. He had two cars. He had a boat. The guy has a home. The guy has two cars.
The guy has a boat. A godly person, now listen to me, can take half the money of a wealthy person and do far more with it and prosper much, much more. You think you need something, so you go in debt. A godly person will wait upon the Lord and pray.
And often times, God will provide what he needs without him ever havening to go in debt. He saves his money. When we came to the states, I wanted to make her a kitchen, a really nice kitchen. Because she loves to cook. And so I got her a stainless steel stove, stainless steel microwave, fridge.
Put this big counter, everything.
It took an entire year to do it. But I build her entire kitchen with less money than it would have taken most people to buy just junk and put it in the kitchen.
My wife is doing this study right now on coupons. Because she found this lady who goes, literally, and buys something like, you know, a couple hundred dollars worth of groceries every week, and pays something like forty-six cents. But God can prosper them above what He prospers the wealthy.
He most certainly can! Now, she is charitable-verse She is marked by kindness and wisdom-verse She is fruitful-verse She delights in her gain and it encourages her.
She sets about with a home business.
Her husband is honored by the most respected men of the city because of her-verse She fears the Lord-verse To end this, let me just say this. Do not marry a Cinderella. Do not marry some beauty queen. You may marry a girl that is gorgeous. You may marry a girl physically beautiful. She will be the girl you want to be with.
But realize his guys, you can be carried away by your sensuality and you can follow after a girl that is death. In the Scripture, there are sensual girls all through out the book of Proverbs, and the Bible describes them as the grave, as the pit, as death, as destruction.
And they really can be. Now, I want us to look at preparation prior to entering into a relationship with courtship. That we are to be content in every stage of our lives that God has given us.
Right now in your singleness, you ought to be content. What ought you be doing?
With this free time in your singleness, you should be preparing for marriage, you should be serving the Lord in a way that you can as a single person, you should be studying hard.
You should be putting back money, you should be preparing. This is a time to prepare. Use this time, completely opposite of what the world tells you, use it to invest. Now, I want us to look at areas of preparation. First of all, spiritually. Now, guys, spiritually we need to be ready, intellectually we need to be ready to marry.
What do you want to hand down to your children? Do you literally want to be this person who knows nothing, so that then you have to hand your children off to some government institution, to fill them up with everything they believe? You must be a person who desires to know.
Most people, after they graduate from college, never read a book. You need to develop yourself intellectually. You need to read the classics. You need to think about using that mind of yours for a purpose and to grow in every area of your life. Now, let me just say this. You were taught to think this way. But you were not taught by Scripture to think this way. Do you know how to use jumper cables?
Can you fix something? And even some of the bigger companies are hiring guys from technical schools, because at least they can do something.
At least they know something. You see, guys, there needs to be… you need to be developed practically. I mean, what can you do? If there was a war, would I jump in a fox hole with you?
Or would I run past and look for someone else? And these are things that are no longer developed in manhood. The practical aspects of life. Hide in a closet and cry? Get together and weep to one another and have a group hug or sing kumbaya together?
What would you do? So much of this! My dad was just an incredible mathematician and things like that. He worked with union carbine and did a lot of things with, did some things with even with his face program, and things like that.
And I can remember my dad sitting down there when I was a kid with a slide ruler and just working out calculations like you could not believe. He likewise encouraged parents to begin now by praying earnestly for our children and their future spouses.
His point was that we must understand what courtship means and why we are spending time trying to come alongside parents and families in this series. Therefore, he encouraged us to refrain from hearing the indictment of Matthew David then moved on to talk about the goal of courtship being a lifelong covenant of marriage. As was pointed out in the first two sermons, recreational dating is glorified divorce practice.
David explained the reason behind courtship. It has an end goal of faithful, committed, lifelong, covenantal marriage. Sometimes we are called as believers to suffer in marriage. Below you will find some helpful articles, books, and sermons on the subject. We are here for you.
Dating, Courtship, and Marriage
We walk along the same path as you in this goal of helping our children understand the importance of courting a mate with a goal of lifelong marriage. Consider the example of missionary Adoniram Judson.
He desired to marry a woman named Ann. He knew he was called to a life of missions and he likewise understood his calling to suffer for Jesus Mark 8: Before he pursued Ann, he wrote the following letter to her father: I have now to ask whether you can consent to part with your daughter early next spring, to see her no more in this world?
Whether you can consent to see her departure to a heathen land, and her subjection to the hardships and sufferings of a missionary life? Whether you can consent to her exposure to the dangers of the ocean; to the fatal influence of the southern climate of India; to every kind of want and distress; to degradation, insult, persecution, and perhaps a violent death?
Can you consent to all this, for the sake of perishing immortal souls; for the sake of Zion and the glory of God? Can you consent to all this, in hope of soon meeting your daughter in the world of glory, with a crown of righteousness brightened by the acclamations of praise which shall redound to her Saviour from heathens saved, through her means, from eternal woe and despair?
Ann was granted to Adoniram Judson. She became his wife and accompanied him on the boat to India.